The BLUGH: January 9, 2026
“I think dogs are the most amazing creatures; they give unconditional love. For me, they are the role model for being alive.”
The end of an era has come. Hazel has died.
I have been a card-carrying member of the Dead Dog Club for decades at this point, but losing Hazel hurt a little more than I had anticipated. I think this has to do with her fast decline at the end and also the fact that she was a vivacious animal—very full of life until she was not.
I know you will indulge me in allowing this BLUGH to serve as an obituary to The Best Friend (one of many nicknames). She was a family dog, but really and truly she was Mommy’s dog.
The following is absurdly long. You are going to scroll and be like, “wow! more?” and the answer will be yes. Saga that it is, there are parts and intermissions, so feel free to take breaks as needed.
Part I: Animal
Hazel (Honey Spit Spit, Angel Diablo, The Best Friend) left her earthly shell on Tuesday, January 6, at approximately 11:30 a.m. She died peacefully at home in the loving arms of her Mommy and in the comforting presence of one of her sisters, Bryton. Our family is forever grateful to Upstate Pet Euthanasia for their care and offering of an at-home departure for pets, including Hazel.
Hazel’s date of birth is a mystery, but she came into our lives in February 2014. Friends of Mommy found her in an empty storage unit, curled up in a little ball because it was very cold. Though we didn’t know her age, she had that puppy softness and she grew in the months after we acquired her. We believe she was somewhere in the 5 - 9 month range in age.
My first memory of Hazel is Mommy carrying her like a little lamb from the car into our backyard. She was like a barnyard animal in more ways than one. She lacked that curious and engaged gaze that dogs that are around people a lot tend to have. She didn’t pay attention to people talking to her at first, and she was a little (and later a LOT) wild. It’s like her personality wasn’t hidden, her personality did not exist. There was no indication that she had had any social interaction with humans. She was full animal, not a pet.
Hazel entering our home meant that we were now in possession of 4 big dogs as we already had 3 dogs. But not to worry! Hazel’s stay was meant to be temporary until we found her a home. She was a fun and playful girl, we’d find her a place in no time.
Efforts to rehome her were…fraught. You see, a few months into living with us, Hazel developed an aggression for other dogs that stayed with her for the rest of her life. I will not go into detail on the efforts that were put forth to eliminate this behavior, but if you are wondering, “Did they try xyz?”, I assure you, we did. Attempting to adopt out a dog with ANY type of aggression is tough, and we worked with rescues and individuals to no avail.
After an extended and fruitless period of attempting to re-home Hazel, we made the decision to surrender her to the pound (the Humane Society was not accepting pit bulls at the time). Bryton and I had the honors and showed up to the pound literally unable to speak because we were so incredibly distraught. We signed some paperwork that said we would be contacted if she did not get adopted to ensure she would not be put down. BRUTAL I KNOW.
Long story short, after visiting her at the pound literally every day for a week, Mommy brought Hazel home. And Hazel didn’t come home empty-pawed. She brought home kennel cough for the whole fam (fortunately all other dogs were vaxed so no spread of disease occurred).
Intermission I: A little video for you
COVID boredom affected us all differently. It manifested for me in the production of this video I made in 2020 to poke fun at the absurdity of our surrender/adoption pound epic with Hazel that I recounted above.
Yes, I made my family be in it. Yes, I played a starring role. No, I did not hear from the Oscars that year. Click on the image or here to see the masterpiece.
Part II: Pet
From then on, Hazel was officially, 100%, certifiably our dog. We kept systems in place to ensure she was never outside at the same time as other dogs. She had a dedicated space in the house and was never brought face to face with any other dogs again. It was a lot of work having 2 “sets” of pets in the house (Set 1: Hazel, Set 2: all other dogs) that had to be separated at all times, but it was made to work.
Hazel, though separated from the other dogs, did not live a secluded life. She went on long walks, wheelbarrow rides (see above video), and was a favorite among dog sitters. I loved coming home from NY and working from home with my “intern”, Hazel.
She was a tennis ball freak and did this really cute thing where she would chew a tennis ball, but if you pet her, she would stop chewing so she could focus on being pet, like she wanted to give either the tennis ball or your pets her full attention.
Hazel also spent a lot of time with BMW interns from Germany that were renting rooms from Mommy during this time. One of them bonded with Hazel hard. This intern was basically Hazel as a human male, and they had a fun time together riding around in his convertible car.
She was a fun girl and was living a fun, if logistically complex, life.
Intermission II: Photo Drop
Part III: Member of the Family
Eventually, all our other dogs (each very dear to us) died, and Hazel achieved her lifelong goal of being an only dog. It is worth noting that we do not suspect foul play on the part of Hazel as it relates to our other dogs’ deaths. They were all old and died naturally. But let me tell you, once she was solo, thus began what we termed, “The Golden Age of Hazel”.
Hazel THRIVED as an only dog. She hosted parties, started a small business, and took up the saxophone. Heck, she went on a cruise!
For real though, these were the most peaceful years for Hazel and for us. She gave up violent hobbies like murdering Canadian Geese (real), a relief to us all. She became VERY fond of dog beds and procured a collection. She loved testing the limits of space and mass by trying to sit as close to Mommy as humanly/dogly possible at every opportunity. She sunbathed a LOT, gave lots of kisses, walked on her balance beam in the park, did her alligator snapping noise, and so much more. She was a very good girl.
If you made it this far, I commend you! Can you tell I loved Hazel? I am very sad but writing this BLUGH obituary helped. Thank you for helping to keep the memory of Hazel alive by reading some of her story here.
I leave you with one of my favorite gravestones at one of my favorite places in Brooklyn, Green-Wood Cemetery. People have always loved dogs and they always will.
